Restoration and Recommissioning
Restoration and Recommissioning (Gospel of John) – April 19th, 2026
Hunkered down, nerve-numb,
in the carnal hut,
the cave of self,
while outside a storm
rages.
Huddled there,
rubbing together
white sticks of
your own ribs,
praying for sparks
in that dark
where tinder is heart,
where tender is not.
Jesus’ disciples may not have had poetic thoughts such as these beautiful words penned by English professor and poet Gregory Orr in his poem Trauma (Storm). But hunkered down and huddled the disciples were, fearful and anxious about raging storms. Today as we come to the end of our journey through the Gospel of John, let’s set aside Sunday School versions of what has just happened. It’s too simplistic to just say that Jesus lived, Jesus died, Jesus rose again. These are all true, but there’s at least one very good reason why the risen Christ lingered physically among his followers for a good 40 days after his resurrection. Trauma. Each and every one of them was deeply traumatized and in need of restoration.
They all lived under pax Romana, the so-called “peace of Rome,” which offered surface-level “peace” as long as you worship the Emperor, do whatever Rome wants you to do, and pay in full whatever tributes, taxes, and tithes were demanded of you. Woe betide anyone who upset the status quo. Those who did often ended up paying the ultimate price. All of Jesus’ closest followers had seen their Lord, their Savior, their best friend brutally scourged, terrorized, and subjected to a cruel and humiliating death through crucifixion on a Roman cross. This is hugely traumatic! Now they were afraid that if they did that to Jesus, they could and likely would do it to them. So now they are hunkered down and huddled behind locked doors, for fear of the Jewish religious leaders who were in cahoots with the Romans and their death-dealing ways.
John told us in chapter 20 that Jesus had already appeared to the disciples twice in that house where they had all been hiding. On both occasions, John tells us that “Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.’” Jesus, our Creator, our Lord, our God, deeply understood the trauma his followers were experiencing.
Let’s take a little side trip here. John had recorded three occasions already in his Gospel when Jesus had spoken about his upcoming ascension, in chapters 3, 6, and 20. It would not be long now until Jesus would ascend to the Father. What does that mean? Did it mean that Jesus would physically go upwards into the sky and disappear beyond the clouds like the Orion Integrity in the recent Artemis II lunar flyby? Would it be some kind of mystical experience? What was he even talking about? Jesus’ death and resurrection mark the transition from Jesus showing and telling the good news of God’s kingdom reign on earth to Jesus’ followers doing these things. Jesus’ ascension is the actual passing of the baton from Jesus to Jesus’ followers.
But we’re not at that part of the story yet. We’re at the part where Jesus’ followers are traumatized, hunkered down, huddled, discouraged, defeated. Why? Because every single one of them has abandoned Jesus. They all feel enormous guilt about that. And maybe rightly so, since guilt is a feeling of doing something bad. They are certainly overwhelmed with shame, too. Clinical psychologist and professor Heather MacIntosh describes shame as “an emotion that can feel like it defines who you are as damaged, bad, helpless, and a failure.” Academic and podcaster Brené Brown defines shame as “the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging—something we’ve experienced, done, or failed to do makes us unworthy of connection.” It’s not hard to imagine these feelings of shame overwhelming each of the disciples’ souls.
I love John’s Gospel. He writes with such love and care even as he tells the good, the bad, and the ugly, always with a redemptive purpose in mind. Like I said a few weeks ago, John doesn’t showcase Peter’s actions just to make his friend look bad. It’s true that on the night that Jesus was betrayed, John specifically draws our attention to what Peter did. Peter had denied Jesus three times, just as Jesus had told him he would. We all hurt other people, even our friends, at times. And other people, even our friends, hurt us. But this was not some ordinary friendship bump. Peter denied that he even knew Jesus. He denied that they were friends. Ouch. Well, you know, all of the disciples did the same thing. All of them deserted Jesus. But Peter, being Peter, did it out in the open for all to see. All four gospel writers make a really big deal about Peter’s denials, which is how we know about them.
Today we are going to look more closely at most of the last chapter of John’s Gospel, John 21.
John 21:1-4 – “After these things Jesus showed himself again to the disciples by the Sea of Tiberias; and he showed himself in this way. Gathered there together were Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathanael of Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee, and two others of his disciples. Simon Peter said to them, ‘I am going fishing.’ They said to him, ‘We will go with you.’ They went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing. Just after daybreak, Jesus stood on the beach; but the disciples did not know that it was Jesus.”
Picture the Sea of Tiberias, also known as the Sea of Galilee. Even though he’s one of them, John doesn’t explain what this group of seven disciples were doing there. There’s no mention of anything faith-related, no praying together, no talking about all that had happened, no mention of Jesus. It’s almost as if they’re in one of those dream states where they can’t remember if those last three years of following Jesus were real or not.
Remember, John wrote his Gospel about 50 years after Jesus’ resurrection. By that time, he had developed into a skilled rhetorician to craft his powerful and persuasive narrative. I admit that for many years I have read this gospel too quickly and slid right past many of the treasures and details that John tucked into it. We can recognize now that the Holy Spirit gave John astounding insights into trauma thousands of years before the onset of systematic studies seeking to understand mental health. PTSD UK explains that “at times of immense stress, it’s common for people to: become combative or overly defensive; to abruptly remove themselves from the situation; or shut down, become withdrawn and unable to make decisions.” It’s not hard to see each of these trauma responses in the disciples. The International Association of Fire Fighters tell us that when trauma isn’t fully processed, the brain acts as if the original threat is still present. Any small details associated with the memory can make you feel like you’re experiencing the trauma all over again. Examples of external triggers include seeing someone related to the trauma; certain sounds involved in the trauma; visual cues related to the trauma; smells associated with the trauma; or specific words or phrases.
Standing there by the sea, the very same sea where he’d been standing when Jesus first called him to follow him, Peter announces, “I am going fishing.” And the others reply, almost robotically, “We will go with you. At least three in this group of seven were professional fishermen. They knew how to fish! It’s kind of funny that John makes sure we know that although they fished all night, they caught nothing.
And then John tells us that “just after daybreak, Jesus stood on the beach; but the disciples did not know that it was Jesus.” I can think of at least five reasons why the disciples do not know that it’s Jesus.
Maybe it’s because they are too far away to see clearly who this person standing on the beach is.
Maybe it’s because just after daybreak, things look a bit hazy because the sun hasn’t yet risen enough to have burned off the water droplets in the air. Poet Henry David Thoreau describes mist over the water as “dew-cloth, dream-drapery.”
Maybe it’s because their minds are plagued by flashbacks of Jesus’ scourged and bloodied body hanging on the cross. These images could be overlaying their physical sight in such a way that they just don’t recognize him.
Maybe it’s because the disciples are sleep deprived. Traumatic memories leave our nervous systems on edge, making it hard to relax or feel safe enough to fall asleep, resulting in emotional distress, constant alertness, racing thoughts, and difficulty winding down – a vicious cycle.
Maybe it’s because their trauma is causing them to dissociate or numb out, leaving them unable to fully process or recognize someone they know quite well.
Whatever the reason, the disciples are covered up with intense fear, crushing sadness, deep anger, and overwhelming guilt and shame. They do not know what to do with themselves. Their beloved teacher and Lord with whom they had lived and walked and ministered for three years is no longer with them day in, day out, as he had been. Even though most of them have seen Jesus in the house where they have been hiding, twice already, they are still traumatized. They feel defeated. They have lost heart.
John 21:5-7 – “Jesus said to them, ‘Children, you have no fish, have you?’ They answered him, ‘No.’ He said to them, ‘Cast the net to the right side of the boat, and you will find some.’ So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in because there were so many fish. That disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, ‘It is the Lord!’ When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on some clothes, for he was naked, and jumped into the sea.”
This is an interesting exchange. Jesus is standing on the shore, while the group of seven are still in their boat on the water. All seven, and especially Peter, as John keeps reminding us, have messed up. They are overwhelmed by fear, sadness, anger, guilt, and shame. From the shore, the first word Jesus calls out to them is “children.” Biblical scholar Francis Moloney says Jesus’ chosen form of address, “not found elsewhere in the Fourth Gospel, indicates intimate authority.” Then, although they still don’t realize who it is on the shore, Jesus gives them what New Testament professor Craig Keener describes as “seemingly nonsensical instructions,” indicating “the obedience involved in discipleship.” Biblical scholar N. T. Wright says, “They are to work for him. They are to be filled with God’s breath, and be sent into the world as Jesus had been. But if they try to do it their own way, they will fail. They will toil all night and take nothing. The only way is for them to admit defeat, to listen afresh to Jesus’ voice, and to do what he says. Then there is no knowing what they will achieve.” They end up with a net so full of fish that they couldn’t haul it in.
It is at this point that the beloved disciple, John himself, suddenly says to Peter, “It is the Lord!” Peter had heard Jesus’ voice but didn’t recognize him. It’s not until John points out Jesus’ identity that Peter wakes up. When Peter realizes it is the Lord, he comes to his senses and tries to cover his shame with clothing. He jumps into the sea, eager to be with Jesus.
John 21:8-12a – “But the other disciples came in the boat, dragging the net full of fish, for they were not far from the land, only about a hundred yards off. When they had gone ashore, they saw a charcoal fire there, with fish on it, and bread. Jesus said to them, ‘Bring some of the fish that you have just caught.’ So Simon Peter went aboard and hauled the net ashore, full of large fish, a hundred fifty-three of them; and though there were so many, the net was not torn. Jesus said to them, ‘Come and have breakfast.’”
This part of the story mentions something quite curious. A charcoal fire.
Atlanta, and almost all of Georgia, is currently experiencing extreme drought conditions, so Paul and I haven’t made any outdoor fires this year. We usually do these regularly throughout the year, both to minimize ground debris and for pleasure. Picking up fallen branches and logs, building a fire, and then relaxing by the fire pit is one of my favorite ways to spend a Saturday afternoon. It engages my senses as I watch the dancing flames, hear the crackling, and smell the wafting smoke.
Jesus is standing on the shore next to a charcoal fire. Although only a couple of weeks had passed, it probably seems like a lifetime since Peter had last smelled the wafting smoke from a charcoal fire, as he had on the night when he had denied Jesus once, twice, three times. Peter didn’t want to think about that. But the aroma of the charcoal fire immediately made him relive the shame and trauma of his denials again. So much for his declaration that he would lay down his life for Jesus.
A lot has changed since that day. Peter is heartbroken and ashamed that he has failed. And now, Jesus is inviting Peter and the others to have breakfast with him. Peter’s shame and trauma are sky high now. He dreads the well-deserved punishment he will surely be given. Jesus has prepared a delicious breakfast of freshly grilled tilapia and bread, but Peter’s trauma has diminished and distorted his sense of taste – he might as well be eating the sand on the seashore.
The other disciples know all about Peter’s three-time denial. Even if they hadn’t hung around the courtyard with Peter, Jesus had predicted Peter’s denials in front of them all at the Last Supper. Plus, Peter wasn’t exactly a quiet, contemplative kind of guy, so they had undoubtedly heard Peter vocalize his regrets many times since that night. Maybe Peter went back to fishing because he knew his actions had been so bad that Jesus would be completely justified in giving up on him.
Now we get to the part of the story where we realize why John has included all of these details. It’s not about Peter’s failure. John’s larger purpose is to focus on God’s restoration.
John 21:15-17 – “When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, ‘Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?’ He said to him, ‘Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Feed my lambs.’ A second time he said to him, ‘Simon son of John, do you love me?’ He said to him, ‘Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Tend my sheep.’ He said to him the third time, ‘Simon son of John, do you love me?’ Peter felt hurt because he said to him the third time, ‘Do you love me?’ And he said to him, ‘Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Feed my sheep.’”
N. T. Wright describes this scene between Jesus and Peter as “one of the most spectacular interchanges in the whole Bible, perhaps in all literature. The most remarkable thing about it is that, by way of forgiveness, Jesus gives Peter a job to do.” Jesus isn’t heavy handed or judgmental with Peter. Jesus doesn’t tut-tut or sigh or say, “I told you so.” Jesus does not berate, correct, or in any way explain things to Peter.
Jesus matches Peter’s triple denial with a triple restoration. Jesus goes right to where the pain is, asking the same question three times, to gently invite Peter into mercy and grace and forgiveness and love. “Do you love me?” Each time, Peter replies, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” Notice how Jesus responds. He doesn’t just say, “That’s good.” Jesus feeds and tends Peter, welcomes and forgives Peter, heals and loves Peter. First, Jesus restores Peter! Then Jesus recommissions Peter to feed and tend others, welcome and forgive others, heal and love others. And the very last thing that John records Jesus saying to Peter is, “Follow me!” (John 21:22)
John doesn’t spell out how Jesus restores and recommissions the others. I think John highlights Peter’s story, his failures and his restoration and his recommissioning, precisely because he wants us to know that Jesus’ restoration is for everyone. If Jesus restored someone like Peter, Jesus can and will restore you, too! No one is beyond the reach of Jesus’ restoration. In just a few days, Jesus would return to the Father, marking the passing of the baton from Jesus to Jesus’ followers. And a few days after that, the Holy Spirit would be poured out, empowering Jesus’ followers to show and tell the good news of the kingdom of God, as Jesus had begun.
We have reached the end of this journey through the Gospel of John. We are also at the beginning of our journey through the rest of our lives. Just as he restored and recommissioned Peter that day, Jesus wants to restore and recommission us today.
Maybe something we talked about today has brought to your attention that you’re carrying unresolved trauma of some kind. Maybe you’re carrying shame for things that you’ve done. Maybe you are ashamed for things you feel you should have done but neglected to do. Maybe you think, “I’ve already received the Holy Spirit, and I’ve been following Jesus for a long time, so I shouldn’t feel this way or that way, I shouldn’t struggle with these issues. I should be able to stay in that place of abiding and peace. I should be able to just believe.” Help is here! Jesus is present to restore and recommission today. I want to invite all of us to lay down every burden, every weight, and the sin that clings so closely, so that we will be free to see where Jesus is leading us and so that we will have the courage, strength, and endurance to do what he leads us to do. 1 Peter 5:7 (NLT) urges us to “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.”
Trauma, distress, trust issues – give them to God!
Grief, guilt, hypervigilance – give them to God!
Shame, self-hatred, self-sabotage – give them to God!
Broken body, broken mind, broken relationships – give them to God!
Depression, anxiety, worries – give them to God!
Fear, unforgiveness, fury – give them to God!
Give all of your heavy burdens to God.
Jesus is present to feed and tend us, to welcome and forgive us, to heal and love us. Receive the mercy, grace, forgiveness, and love of Christ. Receive the restoration of Christ. And now Jesus calls us to follow him.
I want to end our time today by recommissioning and blessing you. And then, I am passing the baton to you as fellow ministers of the gospel of Jesus Christ to recommission and bless three other people in the same way. If you are in the room, I invite you to speak this over three other people before you leave today. If you are on Zoom, I invite you to speak this over three other people today, in person or on a phone call or via a text.
Here is my blessing for you: Sisters and brothers in Christ, Jesus sends you out as wounded healers to feed and to tend, to welcome and to forgive, to heal and to love. Go with God’s blessing and in the power of the Holy Spirit!
Now go and recommission and bless three others:
__________, Jesus sends you out as a wounded healer to feed and to tend, to welcome and to forgive, to heal and to love. Go with God’s blessing and in the power of the Holy Spirit!
