Delegate that which is tedious
Colossians 3:23-24 (The Message) – “Don’t just do the minimum that will get you by. Do your best. Work from the heart for your real Master, for God, confident that you’ll get paid in full when you come into your inheritance. Keep in mind always that the ultimate Master you’re serving is Christ.”
We’ve been talking for a couple of months about delegating, such that we entrust, appoint, or assign things to others in order not to wear ourselves out. I’m convinced that burnout is a short step away for parents who choose to educate their children at home. We must be careful to care for ourselves (body, soul, and spirit), so we can be our best selves and have the strength, endurance, wisdom, and motivation that we need to run this series of marathons. We looked last month at delegating that which is tiny. Today we’re going to look at delegating that which is tedious.
Something tedious is defined as being marked by monotony or tedium; long and tiresome; weary; boring; dull. These are tasks that take a chunk of time out of our days and that we find to be draining in some way. They may be necessary in our lives, but they are not usually founts of joy for us. Because of their monotonous nature, we can learn how to delegate them. Even if it’s not possible to always delegate a tedious task, if we can at least delegate it some of the time, we will have some more breathing room in our lives.
From a spiritual standpoint, there are no tasks that are superior (or inferior) to others. God is just as present with us in times of praising Him through song or studying the Bible as He is in the tedious, the boring, the painful, the situations where we’d prefer to rush through and be done with whatever it is. No matter what it is we’re engaged in, whether we’re sleeping or sitting, waiting or rushing, idle or busy, God calls each of us to be present in the present moment in His presence, to be present with ourselves, to be present with those around us. But again, that still doesn’t mean that we are supposed to do ALL of the tasks at hand. Listen to God’s invitation to you personally – there is no one-size-fits-all formula here. If the Lord highlights something to you, pay attention to His direction. If He’s not directing you to make a change, don’t worry about it, be secure in His love, and simply carry on!
I don’t know about you, but the phrase “tedious task” immediately makes me think of household chores. A duct tape company recently completed a survey of 2000 people to discover the most disliked household chores, which included these potentially tedious chores: cleaning the toilet, cleaning the oven, cleaning windows, cleaning the refrigerator, dusting, cleaning the shower / bath, sweeping floors, doing dishes, doing laundry, taking out trash / recycling. I am fairly confident that we each have mixed feelings regarding the chores in this list – some we enjoy, some we would prefer to delegate. A quick scan of the various personalities on “Here’s How Each Personality Type Feels About Chores” gives us a lot to think about, even if we don’t fully understand the personalities of each of those with whom we live. Suffice to say, we don’t all consider the same tasks to be tedious. We will benefit from identifying these tasks that weigh us down on an ongoing basis and finding creative ways in which to delegate them in such a way that brings life and growth and teamwork and understanding to all.
It’s worth trying to transform a tedious task into something more interesting. Adding music, creativity, or plain silliness to a tedious task can spice it up and remove the tedium. What I’m not trying to say here is to just dump all tedious tasks on unsuspecting family members and just do things we personally find to be interesting or fun. That wouldn’t exactly build solidarity or enthusiasm in others. There’s a lot of truth in the saying, “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.” When it comes to tedious tasks (tasks that make us want to gnash our teeth at times), could it be that “One person’s gnash is another person’s pleasure.” Corny, for sure, but it’s possible that something that you find boring could be the entry point of opportunity or even joy for someone else.
I think that tedious tasks are a normal and expected part of life. Only very young children are completely free from tedium because exploration and play are by definition not tedious. I’m not equating seeing a task as tedious with being ungrateful or negative. I’m just describing the reality that some tasks can be tedious, maybe because of their repetitive nature, maybe because they don’t seem to have lasting value, maybe because they take up large chunks of our time, maybe because they drain us in some way. Even tasks that we used to find engaging can become tedious. We are human, and part of that means we are constantly changing, even if we’re not aware of it. Other things around us can change, too – circumstances, seasons, emotions, relationships, conditions, the weather. The key point here is that we want to be able to identify what is swallowing us up in tedium today that we could potentially delegate. We can’t do it all. It’s okay to share the load.
There is definitely no perfect process when it comes to delegating. I’ll give a few examples from my own life in the hopes that you will be encouraged in your own journey. Feeling overwhelmed – with the burden of responsibility and the multitude of tasks – is common to most parents, more so for home school parents. It’s hard! I’d like to invite you to take some deep breaths and a step back to try and see what lesser things in your life you could delegate in order to regain some space and time in your life for the best and most important things.
Since I had multiple children in various grades in our home school, one tedious task I tended to delegate was the grading of math problems. Depending on the mastery, confidence, and honesty levels of the child, I would either delegate that task to the student in question or to an older sibling. That ended up being a lifesaver for me, because three of my children literally devoured math at such a rate that I wouldn’t have been able to keep up on a daily basis. Then after problems were graded, I could focus my time and attention on helping each one master the material they had not already grasped. The same principle applied to grading of spelling words, which was a core part of our daily routine for each child up until high school.
A tedious task not directly related to home schooling per se, but one that relates to the reality for many home schoolers is that some of us practice what is technically known as “tsundoku,” a Japanese word for acquiring reading materials but letting them pile up in one’s home without reading them. When I first saw this term, I laughed out loud because it so accurately describes my behavior (though I’m consciously attempting to only buy books at the time when I am ready to begin reading them, and just adding the ones I want to read “some day” to my Goodreads list). To be fair to myself, I do read and reference a lot of books on a daily basis – they are my constant companions! But for this recovering tsundokite and lifelong booklover, I’m on a long journey to give away or sell books that I’m realistically not going to need or use in the near future. Giving away books is not tedious for me; it’s a source of joy as I imagine the pleasure and learning they will bring to the recipients! The tedious task to which I’m referring has to do with the process of selling books that have some value in the (used) marketplace. For us, if a book can resell for at least $7, we list it on amazon. In the thick of our homeschooling journey, this became a tedious task for me due to the sheer quantity of books we went through as a family. For a couple of years, I delegated this task to my daughter Cascade, who absolutely loved it because she, too, is passionate about books. It took her many hours to research realistic sale prices, list books online, organize them, and follow through on listings, enquiries, and sales. She learned a lot of valuable skills as she processed the ever-changing messy stacks of books I assembled – for each book, she described it, listed it online, stored it. Once a book sold, she retrieved it and mailed it right away. We gave her 10% of the profits (deducting only the cost of mailing supplies), so it also provided her with a nice side income. At one point, one of my aunts hired her to do the same thing with her books. The point of this anecdote is that it took off of my shoulders a fairly big task that for me was very tedious and provided many benefits for our family and others along the way.
I was recently playing with one of my friends’ children and was startled to discover that in playing house, they were passionately dusting the invisible furniture. I’m almost certain none of my children ever used their imaginations in that exact way, because kids tend to imitate what their parents actually do! I think mine spent a lot of time on their pretend laptops buying or selling books! In any case, we can all think of chores that we enjoy and others that we find to be tedious. There may be other areas of your life where you find yourself getting bogged down or drained by something tedious.
Keep in mind that delegating tasks that are tedious is a living process, not a once-for-all-time action. As loving parents, we want our children to thrive physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, relationally, and to be well-prepared to live as responsible adults. It’s ok to experiment with delegating. Find what works best for your family in this current season of life. There’s no universal tool that works for everyone.
It’s a humbling and awesome thing to remember that God Himself has delegated the task of raising your children to YOU – you are His number one choice for this beautiful, challenging, rich, overwhelming, arduous, joyful, frustrating, loving, mind-boggling, history changing, intimidating, amazing, seemingly impossible task. That doesn’t mean we have to do it all; it means He’s empowered and equipped us to be managers in His Kingdom. Good managers learn how to delegate. God has given us everything He has. He doesn’t ask us to be perfect, but to simply give what we have, even when it feels like we have nothing left. Our ultimate Master is Jesus Christ. He is with us; He will help us; His grace is sufficient. He gives us everything we need – wisdom, strength, direction, resources, motivation – to do everything He’s given us to do. Rest in Him. He’s got you.
Isaiah 41:13 (The Message) – “Because I, your God, have a firm grip on you and I’m not letting go. I’m telling you, ‘Don’t panic. I’m right here to help you.’”
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